The Tracker on my pages reveals various search phrases that were used by random users, as a result of which they landed on one of my pages. Since my Tracker keeps bringing in new wisdom every now and then, you can expect the list below to keep growing until all server space is exhausted, so don't forget to check this orgy of stupidity, banality, illiteracy and perversion once in a while for a good laugh.
If, on the other hand, you find yourself landing here after having searched for phrases like on this list below, don't despair! Your are in GOOD COMPANY with all the rest of the IDIOTS curious people who have searched for similar phrases!
Here are some jewels, classified roughly on content.
"watermelon as masturbation aid"-New and exciting uses for large fruit.
"girl fucking yorself from elephant animel"-The elephant animel strikes again!
"can you go to jail for giving a horse a blowjob?"-Why don't you marry one, since you are already half way there?
"can elephants masturbate"-Pssst: Dude: The important question is do YOU masturbate? Never mind what the elephants do.
"wife needs to be fucked by donkey"-Go to the bazaar and exchange her with one who wants to be fucked by a human. She's damaged goods, friend.
"can i keep my penis continuously inside my wife's pussy for at least 6 hours?"-Sure. If you can manage a six-hour-long erection and you and your wife have nothing better to do for the next six hours...
"my dog put his penis in my pussy"-Another little princess with mating priority problems. Good luck sweetheart!
"my wife is a slut.she will wear any clothes i tell her to and fuck who ever i said and she loved strange cock.the bigger the better"-Tell her to visit the local zoo. She will be impressed even more.
"doctor cummes in pussy of comba pationt"-Calling Doctor Cummes... Doctor Cummes, please come in pussy of COMBA PATIONT!!.
"wife has small pussy"-And that BOTHERS you? Try being GRATEFUL for a change. Some people don't even HAVE a pussy, doofus.
"I hypnotized my wife into fucking the family dog"-Now HERE's a true Coperfield student!
"GILS GETING FUCKED BUY THERE OWN DOG"-Four out of six words spelled wrong. That's a new WORLD RECORD! Woohoo!
"girls who let there dog eat there cunts"-Another Spelling-Bee champion.
"johan abraham dicksize"-Looking for the penis size of the famous Johan Abraham. Anyone has any info?
"dog penis hurts women"-Oh, it does, doesn't it? How about you use a human penis, instead? That'd be PROGRESS!
"vacumclean masturbate"-The dude's daily routine: First vacuum-clean, then masturbate.
"orgasim picters off women riding ahorse"-Another world record in illiteracy!
"hot lady fucked by professer"-The 'professer' strikes again... Watch out!
"dog fuck child and got stuck"-The family dog fucked the kid and its penis got stuck. That's an A+ family...
"luke's penis fuck maria's vulva"-Use THE FORCE, Luke!
"maria fucked force"-A slightly different variation, here: Luke's wife chose to fuck the force. Can't say I blame her.
"please show me some pictures of horses and dogs vaginas and penises"-Yes. Be polite FIRST and hope for the best search results!
"doctors masturbating their women patients to cure insanity"-That's RIGHT! Risperidone, Geodon, Zyprexa and Stelazine all FAILED to cure insanity. The latest clinical trials have shown that psychiatrists MASTURBATING their patients works WONDERS!
"www.dog fuck girl and he was pregnent.com"-Not only the dog fucked the girl, but the dog was 'pregnent', too!
"horny wives vacumcleaning there pussys"-A little English language extensibility, a little porno and lots of spelling mistakes. A GEM.
"latin brothers made to desperately bare their hairy little holes and wank together"-It's the latin brothers, everyone! They wank together! Get your pictures while supplies last.
"fucked with salami"-That's RIGHT. She liked the DELI guy.
"cock being sucked by automatic milking machine movie"-This dude just came back from the cow milking factory. He sure was IMPRESSED.
"my lips go numb when I give blowjobs"-That's the price you have to pay for being a SUCCESSFUL WHORE, princess.
"women prison auxiliary black cock"-Correct. Prisons ALWAYS have several AUXILIARY black cocks to serve women who go to prison. It's part of their rehabilitation program.
"she males fucking guyis"-That's right. Gender-wise, we have four kinds: Males, females, she-males and 'guyis'. The latter have four penises and three vaginas. SIMULTANEOUSLY.
"feel something inside my butt when i sit"-It's a PENIS. Now you've got to figure out WHOSE is it.
"information and pictures how a man can fuck a female donkey"-This fella is extra careful: He is looking for detailed "information" FIRST, before he tries it.
"naked girls putting random objects in there pussy"-Like a violin, for example.
"i fuck white cunts with my black cock and make them pregnant"-Sure. And then the mother gives birth in the toilet to avoid raising up a MORON.
"donkey elefant horss dog faking garls"-Somebody go kill this moron before he gets a chance to procreate.
"witch fucken hole dose the penis go in"-Oh brother. Illiterate, sex-starved and using a COMPUTER. God help us all.
"where i can put my penis in the women pic?"-Another guy who wants to put his penis SOMEWHERE, but doesn't know WHERE.
"how can i make my penish like english sex idio actor"-Can ANYONE figure out what this guy's problem is? I can't. I think he has a problem with his 'penish'.
"witch hole is the pussy"-It's the one you came out of, MORON.
"show me an actual cunt hole"-Isn't the net a wonderful place? It helps you see things which you are NEVER gonna see in real life, if you are an IDIOT.
"her cunt homework she fucked the professor"-Somebody's girlfriend fucked the professor in exchange for a good grade. Well, can't win'em all now, can we?
"show me dog cum"-Another curious IDIOT.
"my dog cums in me"-Good job, princess. Next assignment is the horse in your barn-yard.
"does it hurt when a dog penis enter a women pussy"-Another little princess thinking about procreating with a dog. It figures. With two syntax mistakes per sentence, she'd have better chances with a dog than with a man.
"my wife only comes when being fucked by a dog"-Don't worry friend. Euripides knew all about it. Here's what he said: 'There are four kinds of women: bitches, mares, bees and hogs'. Guess which kind is yours.
"what happens to dog cum when they fuck you"-Who's 'THEY'? Other horny people? The horny dogs?
"male dogs fucking human wives"-That's so YESTERDAY! People are now looking for FEMALE dogs fucking their wives!
"dogcum cow milking"-Wannabe scientist considering PATENTING the practice.
"dogcum, filthy, nasty, whore, cunt"-Dude using his computer for RESEARCH.
"black fucks white puss"-Something or someone black attempting intercourse with a small cat. Wonderful.
"cunt fucked by foot"-That's RIGHT. If you have a small penis, you can use your FOOT.
"how come woman have large cunt holes"-Look around you, at all those questions about dogs, horses and elephants fucking 'woman'. What do you expect?.
"i hide many things in my cunt hole"-Can you hide a WATERMELON in there?
"biggest object put in vagina"-An AIRPLANE. It's the BIGGEST thing you can put in there.
"videos of a girl putting a whole bottle in her vagina"-Full of soda, too!
"watermelon masturbation"-Couldn't you find anything BIGGER?
"how to make a watermelon masturbator"-The next exciting engineering project. Way to go Edison!
"princess margaret masturbater"-It's the famous Princess Margaret Masturbater, everyone! Get yours while supplies last!
"guy fucking watermelon before blowjob"-Yeap. The guy needed some good stimulation before the blowjob, so he chose to fuck a huge FRUIT. BRAVO stud.
"girl putting a watermelon in her pussy"-The girl was a virgin, and wanted to ensure that she'd lose her virginity REAL QUICK.
"pepperoni in cunt"-You've got the RIGHT idea. Then, salami in cunt and afterwards boloney in cunt, and finally foot in cunt!
"a woman has been fucked"-ONLY ONE? Thousands are being probed every day.
"she get fucked by a horse dog"-Yeap. SIMULTANEOUSLY by a horse and a dog. Or individually by a strange creature: A 'horse-dog'!
"male horse fucking male human: looking for pointers"-Here's a good pointer for ya: You are A FUCKING PERVERT!
"human male fucking female horse on ladder"-This fella wants to try something exciting and new!
"getting fucked by a horse sounds a bit painful"-You don't SAY! Why don't you TRY it and then tell us.
"the science of getting fucked by a horse"-That's right. It's a prerequisite college course for Anthropology 250.
"can a women have an orgasm when fucked by a horse"-Inquisitive minds want to know. Inquisitive and ILLITERATE minds, that is.
"horse fucking mastercard"-Yes. The next step is to have the horse fuck a credit card.
"girls with horses with erections"-The usual: Girls playing around with horses. What next?
"will a large dog fuck my bubble butt if i let him"-Why don't you try it? Show your dog your butt to test its intentions.
"butt sucking procedure"-This dude wants to find out how to suck BUTT. Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK with his exciting research.
"shots needle needle or butt or bottom or spanking or fetish butt -fuel"-Kinky fetish with butt needles? NO "fuel", please!
"what is a blowjob"-It's a job where you continuously blow wind. It will suit you fine!
"i built a blowjob machine"-CONGRATULATIONS on your new and interesting engineering project, dude!
"doctor look cunt"-YES, doctor! PLEASE look cunt!
"doctors fucking patients"-Conference at 11:00. ALL specialties invited.
"doctors looking at your penis and fucking it"-HELP! The doctors fucked my PENIS during general anaesthesia!
"fake doctors looking at naked girls"-That's RIGHT. Be careful when you choose your practitioner.
"how do u tell that a woman has been fucked"-If your entire foot fits in her pussy, she DEFINITELY has.
"how can u tell from looking at a pussy if it has been fucked a lot"-If it's your WIFE's, it DEFINITELY has. Not by you, though.
"wanking off tutorial"-Even ANIMALS know how to masturbate, genius. You don't need a TUTORIAL for it. Just follow your INSTINCT.
"scientific disadvantages of male wanking?"-Haven't you HEARD, already? You'll get HAIRY palms and eventually you'll go BLIND!
"do engineers masturbate?"-NEVER. Engineers ALWAYS take a vow of celibacy to avoid Murphy's Law.
"I want to meet and fuck people from Greece free without registration"-Sorry, registration is REQUIRED.
"fucking women without registration"-What is it with those idiots who always go after the freebies? Registration IS REQUIRED!
"australopithecines wanking"-That's RIGHT. Unbeknownst to most anthropologists, australopithecines started walking ERECT, in order to FREE their hands for MASTURBATION.
"wife has hairy cunt"-Do you mind lending her to me for a while?
"wife likes big penis"-Tough luck, sport. Try those penis enlargement patches.
"grandma showing her hairy cunt to anyone who look"-That's MY kind of grandma! Way to go!
"most hairy female cunt known"-It's grandma's. See above.
"let's suck grandma's cunt"-YEAH! Let's GO! What are you waiting for?
"grandma being fucked by dog"-That's one BRAVE dog. Must be ol' Rusty.
"older women who like to get there hairy cunt ate"-Let's give this guy a hand to find older women 'who like to get there hairy cunt ATE'. 2 spelling and 1 syntax mistakes all in one sentence. WooHoo!.
"who wants there pussy ate know"-Another English PROFESSOR searching the net.
"do women like their pussy ate"-And AGAIN...
"photos of women fucking and sucking and getting pussy ate"-And AGAIN...
"i play with my wife's pussy while she sleeps"-That's RIGHT. Cause when she's awake she's fucking the HORSE, loser.
"the dog ate Maria's pussy"-While you were sitting there WANKING OFF, eh? Now, THERE's a good fucking PERVERT.
"fuck my wife"-This guy needs a DIVORCE, quick.
"wife needs to be fucked"-So WHAT THE HELL are you doing WASTING your time on the NET? Don't you have a JOB TO DO?
"can horse riding cause orgasms?"-No, but the HORSE can. Use with CAUTION!
"i want horse riding then we fucked"-Boring AND Illiterate. YAWWWWNNNNNNnnnnn.
"phrases for men who cum quick"-Here's one: You are a fucking LOSER.
"before i could ask her out she slept with a loser"-Tough luck, sport. It happened to me too. Find another penis box.
"how to fuck a female cow"-You'd obviously need a ladder and a RED CAPE. Make sure a male BULL is around when you attempt it.
"procedure to fuck"-Would
you like a Pascal or C procedure for that?
"procedure to fuck a woman"-Ah, that's BETTER. At least this guy wants a SPECIFIC procedure.
"elephant dick size"-Visit
the zoo and stay in an elephant cage for a while. I am sure the gentle
animal will oblige after a while.
"elephant dick growing"-Another elephant DICK-LOVER. Let's direct him/her to an appropriate website, shall we?
"elephant penis cum"-Common people! Let's help this guy find sites with elephants CUMING. Extra bonus if you can find sites with elephants MASTURBATING.
"elephant dick young,cum"-Cum, little young elephant! Show us your DICK!
"the woman was raped by an elephant"-Crazy elephant RAPIST running around. Call 911. QUICK!
"obscure secret fucking"-YAAAAAAAWWNNN.
"nailed without a condom"-WOW,
you did it, sparky! When you get the CLAP or AIDS, give us a ring.
"my penis throbbed as i ejaculated inside her"-YAAAAAAAWWNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
"fucking dog animal sex no virus"-Somebody hasn't LEARNED their LESSON, I guess.
"horney male banging animals no virus"-Ditto. Somebody ILLITERATE who hasn't learned their lesson.
"jerk my wife hairy cunt"-What do you have in mind, sport?
"riding a horse makes her cum"-Uh
oh. I think your girlfriend's BOUND to give you TROUBLE after a while.
Find another one.
"the zoo guy fucked by horse"-Yeah, he forgot to close the zoo cage door and the horse caught him off guard.
"my wife got fucked with a horse"-You should 've been more careful, buddy.
"videos of woman been fucked by horse"-Adolescents looking for ACTION. Geez... What NEXT?
"guy who dies getting fucked by a horse"-This feller is VERY curious!
"lady gives horse a blowjob and dies"-It was the lady's last wish. She died from excitement after the horse came in her mouth.
"pictures of women being fucked by big dogs"-What I don't understand is how these searches end up on my web pages...
"women fucking fruits"-That's RIGHT: Either women are fucking fruits, or...they are fucking fruits. Which one?
"a girl giving blowjob to a horse"-YES, my friend. T'is GOOT.
"procedure for giving blowjob to wife"-This guy is married to a woman with a PENIS.
"+fucked "poker" -online -video
-she -woman -girl -female -texas"-There you have it fellas: The
MOTHER of ALL search
phrases...
"how to have a dog fuck you"-LEAVE
the POOR animals ALONE, you PERVERT!
"wife likes fucking dog"-BUMMER. My suggestion? UPGRADE. Tell her to try a HORSE. After the horse, try an ELEPHANT.
"wife fucking our dog"-That's the price you have to pay for buying a wife from the BAZAAR.
"human horse interspecies mating"-Have
you TRIED the obvious and it failed or are you just looking for INFO?
"eat my mom pussy out"-Oedipus
exhalted. The word MOTHERFUCKER comes to mind...
"pepperoni cock"-Kinky guy,
this one. He or she likes it HOT and LONG.
"women fucked with ape"-Someone
has kinky sexual fantasies, again...
"women fucking bats"-Anyone? Let's help this guy find women fucking some large bats. VAMPIRE bats preferred.
"women fucking baseball bats"-Would
you like YOURS to be doing that? Better order some VIAGRA, QUICK.
"women with a baseball bat in her cunt"-Another LOSER in desperate need of VIAGRA.
"women fucking donkeys"-What's da matter? No local HORSES available?
"are there any sites showing girls getting fucked by horse or donkeys"-Plenty. Unfortunately you hit a site which makes FUN of IDIOTS who search for this stuff. Enjoy.
"pictures on mating of horse,elephant and donkeys showing their big penis"-Let's give the guy a helping hand to prepare his report for Anthropology 101.
"woman fucked by salami"-Yes. A BOLOGNA salami. WTF?
"baseball bat in the vulva"-'vulva' refers to the EXTERNAL parts of a vagina. You cannot put a baseball bat in the EXTERNAL parts of a vagina, IDIOT.
"machines fucking"-The
future script of Terminator. Check with Hollywood, dude!
"little white fucking machines"-Check
it out! Not only 'fucking machines', but 'little, white' ones! One
wonders what this fella has in mind...
"used fucking machines"-Check
with eBay. They might have one for SALE.
"how to build my own butt fucking
machine"-Exciting science fair PROJECT you've got there, sparky.
"fuck videos of men being fucked by an machines"-The Hollywood script writers should have added this little obscure part to the TERMINATOR series. They probably forgot.
"build my fucking machine"-Somebody
DO SOMETHING about these morons who want a 'fucking machine'. Hey, moron, did you know there are creatures called 'females'/'males' out there? Try them some time.
"fucking machines exhausted vacuum cleaner"-This genius is contemplating using a vacuum cleaner for testicular release. What NEXT?
"blowjob machine vacuum instructions"-There we go, AGAIN.
"blowjob using a vacuum cleaner"-Another ADVENTUROUS feller!
"the vacuumcleaner sucked up my cock"-Serves you right for using it for a blow-job.
"huge boobs and the vacuum cleaner"-The title of the guy's new BOOK.
"cannot sit butt hurts"-You've been BUSY lately, eh?
"fucking machine doctors"-What
did I tell you? Somebody FINALLY had an accident with those "fucking
machines". Serves you RIGHT, buddy.
"Porno of Doctors fucking there
own patient movies"-Let's all give this guy a HELPING HAND to
find porno of doctors fucking "there" MOVIES. I wonder who has to be
more PATIENT: The MOVIE or the DOCTOR fucking it.
"doctors fucking there patients while there asleep"-You DON'T have to worry. Doctors like fucking LITERATE patients while 'there'2 asleep.
"how to lock porno jpg"-This dude is so excited about his .jpg PORNO collection, he wants to LOCK the photos, so nobody steals them.
"fuck with pregnant"-TSK,
tsk, tsk...
"elephant masturbator"-Is that what you do for a living, buddy?
"who's giving the horse a blowjob?"-Your WIFE, while you are at work?
"female giving horse a blow job until it cums"-Same answer as above.
"instructions for a girl to give a horse an erection"-Don't worry friend. Horses INSTINCTIVELY know which females are RECEPTIVE. If the horse sees your girlfriend and is not interested, it's a BUMMER!
"Horse gives guy a blowjob"-Yes. It's the HORSE's turn now to give a blowjob.
"african elephant's dick being sucked"-By YOU? CONGRATULATIONS. You win the PERVERT OF THE MONTH award.
"dog fucks woman while she sleeps"-That's one SMART dog, if it can do that trick.
"dog fucks woman by mistake"-It certainly wasn't the DOG's mistake...
"dog fucks unsuspecting girl"-Yes, the girl was very UNSUSPECTING and the dog took advantage of it.
"rusty dog fucks girl"-Good ol' Rusty! He did it AGAIN!
"dog fucks grandma's cunt"-Dogs seem to be particularly POPULAR in perverts' minds.
"ape fucks woman"-CHECK IT OUT! Film at 11:00 am!
"bull fucks girl"-If the bull can do that without killing her, they should give him a prize.
"guy fucks masturbator"-Yes. The next step is to fuck a WALL.
"woman fucks elephant"-EVERYBODY! DOCUMENTARY at 3:00 pm!
"woman gets fucked by elepahtn"-The 'elepahtn': A strange, as of yet unclassified animal. Has six feet, one hand and twenty heads with three eyes on each head. WooHoo!
"woman fucks watermelon"-...and DIES afterwards?
"guy fucks vacuum cleaner"-He probably doesn't have anything BETTER to do...
"woman fucks vacuum"-I bet he means "vacuum cleaner". Wait: It could be "vacuum bulb" or something else I can't think of...
"boy fucks grand mom"-Makes her CUM, too!
"guy fucks watermelon"-...and then SELLS it to unsuspecting hungry customers?
"fucks watermelon"-Your boyfriend?
"elephant fucks girl"-Was it a TRAUMATIC experience, little girl?
"veterinarian fucks horse"-Yeap! A MALE horse, too. Better watch out who your veterinarian is and what he does when you are not there.
"male fucks horse vulva"-Male WHAT? Human? You, I presume.
"doctor fucks elephant"-Your average medical practitioner's dirty little secret.
"dog fucks veterinarian"-This completes the fucking circle.
"mac fucks horse"-Now we have a computer doing a horse. What next?
"ghost fucks woman"-Passing to metaphysics, now. NEEEEXT!
"horse fucks owner"-The horse was a bit horny and got confused.
"large horse fucks female to death"-It's the new fad for bored wives. Watch out dude.
"woman fucks vacuum"-Ghost or vacuum cleaner? Which one dude?
"fuck me she male horse fuck"-This ingenious feller wants to be fucked by a 'she-male' horse. We'll wait for further instructions...
"my first fuck was my grand dad"-Talk about dirty old men, eh?
"fucked by my grand dad"-Did the old man have a big schlong?
"dream about being fucked by dirty old pervert"-The new generations are getting BETTER, day by day.
"dirty old men with big donkeys wanking"-Who's wanking? The dirty old men or their donkeys?
"baseball bat ass -'goo goo dolls'
fuck"-What the FUCK?!
"Chester the molester"-Somebody's
been reading too many Hustler magazines. If only the "Chester"
cartoonist was good, too...
"nude girl attaché"-Wouldn't
you like THAT, now?
"I like it black porno magazine"-Don't
forget to visit your local ZOO and check the horses out. Ask a
veterinarian to help you out with some of the more "elaborate"
functions of these useful animals.
"oh grandma his black cock feels so goo in my cunt"-EASY now, little girl. I've got a horse to sell for a good price, if you are interested.
"black-cock in-my-cunt"-ANOTHER adventurous little girl with high AMBITIONS.
"vulva beautiful"-She IS,
ain't SHE?
"I swallowed dog cum will it hurt me"-Oh, Jesus Christ, I'm gonna VOMIT!
"pigs copulating"-This fella just remembered his parents.
"sexual positions"-If you
are old enough to search the net and you still don't know some, you are
DOOMED.
"kid ejaculated"-CONGRATULATIONS!
You (or your kid) have(s) reached puberty.
"stay awake masturbate"-Sounds
like a GOOD strategy to me.
"masturbate while buzzed"-Sounds
like a BAD strategy to me.
"video guy gets an erection"-Did he really? How do you know? Did you FONDLE him during the video presentation?
"fuck mother"-SHAME on you,
idiot.
"my brother and I fucked"-NOBODY
CARES! Do it again, if you like.
"I fucked an ape"-And you
are PROUD of it? They should probably put you in a ZOO, along with the
other PRIMATES.
"ape fuck girl"-That's probably a REAL ape typing at the search engine. A REAL, HORNY ape.
"mr potatoe cock"-Yeap. You heard it here FIRST, folks. Mr. Potato-head's COCK.
"explain me about penis machine"-How about THAT: It's your HAND until you are literate enough to perform good searches.
"penis box"-Yeap! Another synonym for 'your HAND'.
"pic women fucking dogs pigs horse and any other animal they want to"-Another primate on the loose. Call 911.
"animal sex (dogs, horses, pigs, snakes and cows are fucked or fuck) and shitting videos"-Another animal researching its sexual habits.
"i love you daddy please fuck my pussy"-Something has gone awfully WRONG with this girl.
"kids love to be fucked"-I somehow don't think your explanation will stand up in court, when they get hold of you, you fucking PEDERAST.
"widening my butt"-Another fella with an EXCITING science project. Have you ever heard of BUTT PLUGS? Try one. They are CHEAP!
"no new mercury lamps will be installed"- Yeah. BUMMER. Mercury lamps should be installed EVERYWHERE, but what can you do? Technology changes...
"(3n)!/(3n-1)!"- WoooHoo!
"expenential fractle"- A guy who doesn't know how to spell, but nevertheless wants to know more about exponential fractals! Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK!
"the big bang is tree knowledge good evil"- Adam and Eve ate the big bang! Film at eleven!
"high school pressure discharge tube"- It's the High School Pressure Discharge lamp, everyone! Get yours, while supplies last from Edmund Scientific!
"animated gift homeomorphism"- Looking for an animated homeomorphism, to give as a gift. This dude sure LOVES math.
"galois euclid annoy"- Either Galois annoyed Euclid, or Euclid annoyed Galois, or a dumb student is annoyed by his Group Theory and Euclidian geometry courses.
"(620448401733239439360000)!"- This dude is hoping to find a decimal expansion for 620448401733239439360000 FACTORIAL. He is either severely retarded or he's just playing games with the search engine.
"who are the descendants of ancient greeks"- Here's a clue, sporty!
"who are the descendants of modern greeks"- The KIDS of the guys in the previous answer, genius!
"the most beautiful integer"- MINUS ONE. It describes your FATE in life.
"will aliens live on earth 2,000,000years from now"-The REAL reason we do SCIENCE: To know the answer to questions like THIS.
"triangel archimedes area circel"-The archimedes circel is approximated by tri-angels or tri-demons. WooHoo!
"in space the penis can explode during an erection"-In space your whole body will explode, Einstein.
"mathemathics explain the reality?"-Before mathematics can explain reality to you, you should learn to SPELL and form syntactically correct sentences, DOOFUS.
"how do you find the area of a circle when the perimeter is given?"-Holy Cow! Somebody KICK this kid out of geometry class, BEFORE the professor finds out about his question.
"locating uranus with a 60 mm scope"-You will need two mirrors for that, in addition to the 60mm scope.
"how to spectrascope using cd"-This dude wants to "spectrascope" using a CD. Let's tell him that he needs to learn to SPELL first.
"infinitesimal time infinite space cause light events"-Somebody call 911. This guy is planning to travel in time.
"what are the mathematical brain teaser"-They is something you'll never know, until you learn how to spell.
"function of mathematician"-"A mathematician is a machine for converting coffee into theorems" --- Alfred Renyi
"mathematical equations for brain functions"-Here's the equation that describes YOUR brain function: 1=0.
"sqrt(sqr(2)sqr(3))"-Somebody NOTIFY this kid's father, URGENTLY!
"danger mathematics (pdf)"-DANGER! DANGER Will Robinson! Mathematics .pdf file APPROACHING!
"how to solve 1-e=0"-WOWZERS!!!
"6 cm how many mm"-HOLY COW! That's a "D" for you in Physics class, sport.
"a female mathematician (search the phrase)"-This fella TELLS the search engine what to do! OKAY!
"what will a human look like in the year 2020"-We will have VERY BIG BRAINS and HEADS in 2020, to combat stupidity which is now spreading at an ALARMING RATE.
"address-list"-This poor guy either lost his address book or doesn't know how to use it and is now looking for it on the NET. Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK!
"photos of ramapethicus man"-This guy is looking for PHOTOS of a pithecine that lived at least two million years ago. Anybody travelled in time back then and took some PHOTOS? Hurry up please, this guy is doing RESEARCH!
"how to burn motherboard"-You need an appropriate machine language instruction for that. Check the new Tangertas Opcodes out.
"fucking code for round robin in c"-This poor college student is not very happy with his OPERATING SYSTEMS assignment.
"how to reach andromeda"-CHECK IT OUT! This guy wants to travel to ANDROMEDA! Let's all give him some good ADVICE! Here's mine: take some LSD. You'll be able to travel ANYWHERE!
"prove the zero rule of exponents"-No. YOU prove it, you lazy idiot. Do you KNOW that your DAD is paying for college?
"rusty nails experiment"-Let's all give this guy a HELPING HAND with his NEW and INTERESTING science project.
"dog cum rusty nails"-If a dog cums on nails will they RUST? Sounds like a fun science project.
"genetically engineer flying horse"-Hold on TIGHT. Our engineers are MANUFACTURING one as we speak.
"intelligent words converter"-You should be looking for a 'stupid words converter', INSTEAD. Intelligent words are fine the way they are. Leave them ALONE.
"big bang david coperfield"-Coperfield is a good illusionist, but don't you think you are asking a BIT MUCH of him?
"what do we need to build a golgi?"-Look at your left kitchen DRAWER, where all of your grandma's RECIPES are. Chances are she'd made one at one time or another. If you can't find the recipe, ASK her. Be polite.
"genome responsible for life period ?"-If we knew this genius, we'd be IMMORTAL.
"proof of lemma 4"-Follows from LEMMA 3. Do a google search on LEMMA 3.
"trigonometric orgasms"-This guy gets an ERECTION, whenever he sees equations like cos(pi)=-1.
"verify that x=r2"-Are you SURE x equals r2?
"if w=f(z), is analytic, then"-Yes? Then WHAT, EINSTEIN?
"author research"-YES! ANONYMOUS author research is the latest fad at Harvard. Go for it, sport!
"what magnification to make something 100 times bugger"-100 times 'bugger' IS a magnification of 100, Einstein.
"constant sequences converge"-If that isn't as OBVIOUS to you as the fact that the Sun RISES every day, you oughta drop out of school, genius.
"what is the infinite brain"-it's
exactly what you DON'T have.
"lawyer phrases with math"-This lawyer fella is determined to WIN his cases at all costs. He plans to use MATHEMATICAL ARGUMENTS to convince the judge.
"Mrs virus"-Yeap. She is the wife of Mr. virus.
"the ratio of car in the country"-Did
you KNOW you could find RATIOS of CARS in the country? No? You should
get out more.
"the characteristics of suitable light sources"-Anyone? SUITABLE light sources ONLY please!
"when did georgie Laforge become chief engineer"-Um, when chief O'Brien left for
DS-9?
"integrate girlfriend with respect
to calculus"-Uh, oh. This guy is a little TOO SERIOUS about
calculus. He wants to integrate EVERYTHING and EVERYONE around him.
Call 911 QUICK before he does any damage.
"what are some examples of
nonintegers"-This fella never ate HALF a cookie, a FOURTH of a
pie and never drank a THIRD of a full glass of water.
"difficult iq test"- Not
only an IQ test, but a DIFFICULT one, eh? Are you thinking of applying
to MENSA, dude?
"stupid iq test trick friends infinite"-Let me GUESS: You are trying to find a STUPID iq test to TRICK your FRIENDS about the INFINITE? If you find an iq test that can do that, it won't be very stupid, now, will it?
"fuck e math"-This guy has
a grudge against the base of the NAPERIAN LOGARITHMS.
"fuck sine"-The SINE
trigonometric function is haunting this dude. I bet he doesn't like
COSINE, either.
"porno sine Greece"-In case you are wondering, that's a famous mathematics function. Others are the PORNO COSINE and the PORNO TANGENT functions.
"hw#3 find the sequence with each of these functions as its exponential generating function. f(x)=3x^..."-This ingenious college student tries to stuff the ENTIRE homework problem into the search engine. That's a "D" for this IDIOT!
"analyse graph of y=x^n^x"-You get a "D" for not knowing how to SPELL, and your teacher gets an "F" for giving you such a problem.
"where do greece get their food"-We
ORDER it from the restaurant at the end of the universe.
"most intelligent duck"-the
scientists are RESEARCHING this, as we speak. Be patient.
"greatness of hitler"-A
little faulty logic here, fellas. Nothing to see, really. Move along,
move along...
"complex exponential effect of real"-That's
a NEW research AREA in Math, ain't it?
"maple function for ackermann"-Non-primitive
recursive functions which grow hyperexponentially CANNOT be built in,
cause they would cause overflows even for very small arguments, genius.
"hitler's fatal mistake"-His
fatal mistake was BEING BORN.
"fuck mathematics"-ANOTHER
poor student having TROUBLE with Calculus.
"series expansion of log(x)"-Another
DESPERATE math student who can't read his/her Calculus book.
"e^x expansion"- This one's
looking for the simplest series expansion there is. You can tell that
whoever it is, they either don't understand their Calculus book or they
haven't opened it yet.
"5^2 series expansion"-Holy
Cow...
"series expansion (x-1)"-I
better not comment on this...
"series expansion table"-For
WHICH series, dork?
"n! series expansion"-GULP! I'm gonna CHOKE!
"proof series n!/n^n"-YIKES!
"series expansion ^-n"-This one's CREATIVE. Hopes to find a series for SOMETHING raised to (-n). I say it's STILL a "D" for him in math class.
"Temporarily disable antivirus
program"-Now, THERE's a real power user.
"a building that is well known in
greece"-The PARTHENON dummy. It's been SITTING here for
almost 3,000 years. Didn't you go to SCHOOL?
"math plot 1/f"-Oh, that's
a good one! Let's see if we can find plot pictures of 1/f for an
ARBITRARY f. Well, it's HIS dad paying for college, not mine...
"expansion of sqrt(2)"-Another
math genius doing his research. Here's a clue, sport: It's INFINITE, so
you won't find it anywhere on the net.
"1/e calculate"-This one
doesn't know how to calculate an approximation for the inverse of a
number. Wonder why he asks...
"c code exponents"-THERE's
your average programming GENIUS, as well. Here's a hint chief: There
are READY MADE MATH LIBRARIES for this stuff.
"value of lambda mm"-Oh,
that's a PHYSICS student, alright, not knowing how to convert between
nm and mm. YOU GET A "D", buddy.
"you know your greek when"-"You
know YOU'RE greek when", bozo. Do you know how to use your OWN
language? Sheesh...
"mosquitos athens"-he's
probably right to be curious. The mosquitos in the States can kill an
elephant.
"programming scanner"-What
KIND of scanner, perfesser? Virus scanner or image scanner?
"solving second equation"-This
math prodigy has all equations nicely classified: Shame on you for not
knowing the SECOND equation.
"tele-transport meaning"-Check
with LaForge, down in engineering.
"what time greece today"-This
guy's forte is RELATIVITY. I bet he's teaching Tensor Analysis at some
school.
"tell me what the population is in
greece today"-NO. How's that for an answer?
"how religion is in greece today"-It is very WELL, thank you!
"where is greece today?"-It's on the same location it was 3,000 years ago, genius.
"solving for n points on a circle"-Of
course. How could I ever miss this incredible solution method?
"the creation of bubble-gum and
making some yourself"-Now THERE's a guy who's found a good
pastime. Here's a HINT fella: You can buy TONS of it in a supermarket,
CHEAP.
"which bubble gum blows the biggest bubble/ science fair project"-What happened to citrus-powered light-bulbs? Biology and gardening projects? Solar/light-powered fans? There are thousands of projects to pick from and you chose to investigate BUBBLE-GUM? What a MORON!
"show me science fair projects on bubblegum"-There we go, AGAIN.
"worrying is like solving an algebra equation with chewing gum"-That's RIGHT. That's why the previous fellas are REALLY interested in bubble-gum science projects. The bigger the bubble, the faster the equation is solved.
"science fair project watermelon lamp"-This would get you an "F" just for mentioning it in Physics class.
"noah's ark science fair projects"-Build the ark and get IN THERE, QUICK. We'll take care of the rest for you.
"alpha centauri clock speed"-This
one's probably planning a trip there. Tell us ALL about it when you
come back, friend.
"toy crane machine secrets"-Uh,
huh. Tell us all about it now. Use your OWN words. We'll keep notes and
we promise not to lock you up prematurely.
"toy schematics"-For WHICH toy, Einstein?
"email instructions"-Another
computer savvy user. Let's all give him a helping hand.
"virtual engine instrument for
engine"-If this guy succeeds in finding whatever he's looking
for, he will surely be able to fly. At least.
"how to proof this equation r=??/a"-This
one's creative: Check the use of the wildcard characters. YOU GET AN
"F", BOZO!
"uranium refine diagram"-Uh,
oh. Somebody's looking for trouble...
"how the fuck do you measure atomic radii"-It's a DIFFICULT job, but SOMEBODY's got to do it.
"will time machines come?"-Of
course they will. Time machines can have ORGASMS, too!
"kid in spaceship goes forward in time"-We have a young TIMELORD here, folks! Let's all wish the kid, GOOD LUCK on his JOURNEY!
"reach for the stars ladder"-Why
don't you build one yourself, dude?
"how to make a time machines"-Now,
THERE's your average young EINSTEIN, trying to build his science
project.
"mathematics as a function of the
brain"-Is it? That's news to me. I always thought of Mathematics
as a function of my right foot.
"skin burns from xenon light"-We have a DARWIN AWARD candidate here, folks! Operating an unprotected Xenon lamp and getting skin burns, you are VERY LUCKY the Xenon bulb (which operates at > 90 atmospheres) didn't EXPLODE, which would leave you with melting hot quartz pieces flying all around you.
"color temperature of black light"-Black light DOESN'T HAVE a color temperature, Edison, because it's plain INVISIBLE ultraviolet radiation.
"handheld wavelength"-Wavelength that's HANDHELD, eh? YOU GET A "D" IN PHYSICS CLASS, MORON!!
"color spectrum for blacklight"-Have you ever wondered why blacklight is called "BLACK" light? Perhaps because it's INVISIBLE ultraviolet radiation? Does ultraviolet radiation have a "color"? THAT'S AN "F" FOR YOU, Einstein.
"black light luminance"-Here we go AGAIN.
"handheld full spectrum black light"-This guy is looking for a "full-spectrum" blacklight lamp. Nevermind the fact that blacklight is INVISIBLE UV radiation. So let's all wish him GOOD LUCK in finding such a lamp.
"how many spectroscope are there"-Billions and billions!
"export out of greece"-YES,
that's right. Things are exported 'out of'. I have yet to see things
exported 'in' a country.
"calculating the sin"-Better
check with your local parish. They'll tell you EXACTLY how much it is
in your case.
"2 exponent 3, using c"-It
equals 8, genius. No need for C code to calculate it. YOU GET AN "F" in
programming class!
"show that a real, even function
of x(t) real and even"-You want to show that a REAL, EVEN
function is REAL and EVEN? Hmmm...Hard question. Better check with
sci.math.
"photography using angles"-ALRIGHTY...Don't
forget your COMPASS, now, you hear?
"atomic bomb diagrams/plutonium
bomb diagram"-Uh,
oh. More people looking for trouble...
"baby lab monkeys"- I smell
EVIL and DEMENTED scientists in the air...
"does mosquitos sleep"-Does
being illiterates is funny? Yes, it does.
"the role of the horse in ancient
greece"-Um, I THINK horses were used as aides to philosophers
and housewives, back then. Pretty useful animal, the horse.
"make virtual human download"-To
download a virtual human off the net, you'd need a VERY fast line, dude!
"what special characteristics did
the homo habilis have that helped them to survive"-they
MASTURBATED a lot.
"genius math illusion"-YES.
It's an ILLUSION if you THINK you are a math genius. You are RIGHT
about THAT.
"biological designs for logos"-Somebody's
trying to clone Jesus. Or something like that...
"biological codes for the christ race"-What am I telling ya? The latest fad is Jesus cloning.
"free spider from cocoon"-YEAP.
Free the poor spider from its OWN cocoon. The spider went WHACKO and
cocooned itself.
"how did my spider visit web page
every hour"-Somebody isn't very happy with web-spider programs
visiting his web pages. HEY, consider it an increase of your popularity.
"eye of pupil"-It's EYE
PUPIL moron. Eye of pupil is the eye of a student.
"child time machines"-This
one wants a CHILD time machine. An ADULT time machine won't do.
"starting salaries in greece"-VERY
low, unless you have a nice ass or pussy.
"$00000015"-That's a REALLY
bad POINTER you've got there, buddy. Press RESET, quick.
"increasing exponential equation"-An
equation that's INCREASING? YOU GET A "D" in Math class, moron!
"johann heinrich lambert function"-That's RIGHT folks! Lambert's mother gave birth to a FUNCTION. She named it Johann Heinrich Lambert.
"I don't understand the lambert function"-Let's give this guy a helping hand, shall we? He is confessing his pain to the search engine.
"devil function"-It's the function the DEVIL uses! Otherwise known as the COERCION function. Be VEWY VEWY CAREFUL!
"possible endings for the universe"-NEVER
MIND about the universe. Worry about YOUR ending, which will come
BEFORE the universe's.
"math: suspicious points"-I
always suspected certain points as SUSPICIOUS in math, myself. Better
call 911 and report them.
"i have 4 points and i need the
equation plot"-I have a much harder problem: I have 6 billion
morons and I NEED a 100 terraton H-bomb to clean this planet up!
"dying bacteria strange feeling"-I
didn't KNOW bacteria could express their FEELINGS!
"a code for heuristic virus scan"-Why
don't you start SIMPLE, learning first how to identify a virus using a
SIGNATURE and THEN worry about HEURISTICS?
"auxiliary math proof"-YEAP,
there are two proofs for every math problem: The direct one, for normal
students and the AUXILIARY one, for IDIOTS.
"hg-lamp contains mercury"-By
JOVE! This guy figured it all out! Perhaps that's why it's called a
'hg-lamp'.
"function of spectacles"-How
OLD are you sport? 6? Even 6-year-olds KNOW what spectacles ARE.
"plain glass eyeglasses"-That's RIGHT. These are the glasses actors wear in movies to make themselves look like they are wearing true glasses. Pretty USEFUL stuff.
"difference real jewels from fake
ones"-Contemplating your future job? Better know your stuff
before you try to steal the Star of Africa, eh?
"house in middle of the M62"-There
is a house in the MIDDLE of Messier object 62? By Jove, how come Hubble
hasn't IMAGED it, yet? Who goes there?
"odd continuation of the function"-An
odd continuation of the function would be very...odd, indeed.
"superstition tricks to do with
your friends - make them feel like there floating when there not"-I
think you better learn to spell FIRST, and THEN try to become David
Coperfield.
"illusions that makes you fall asleep"-ANOTHER David
Coperfield fan, wannabe hypnotist. It's a popular job, nowadays...
"david coperfield spectacle photos"-This guy just wants to see Coperfield's SPECTACLES. Talk about strange FETISHES.
"david coperfield official shite"-This guy wants Coperfield's official SHITE. Let's GIVE IT to him.
"pi numerically defined"-Alrighty.Got
some PAPER? Get ready so I can dictate infinitely many decimal digits
to you.
"what animal's fingerprints are identical as human's fingerprints"-This fella's heard somewhere that primates have fingerprints, so now he is trying to locate the source of the fact, preferably finding animals with IDENTICAL fingerprints to humans. WOOOHOOO!!
Art, Music, MIDI, Composers, Pianists, Painters!!
"js bach extraterrestrial"-Didn't you know? It's supported by the latest research!
"how many pages of bach music per day"-As many as you can handle, Schubert!
"bach 8 little preludes and fugues authorship"-Another clever internet user. Looking for the AUTHORSHIP of the 8 little preludes and fugues by BACH. Who could the composer be, I wonder...
"die disappointed sermon"-This feller is looking for the 'die disappointed' sermon. Let's help a bit with the lyrics and music. Everybody together now: "We all die disappointed, LA, LA, LA, we all will die disappointed, even those who die happy, LA, LA, LA,..."
"harpsichord registration"-This dude got a harpsichord as a Christmas present. Now he wants to register it online. Let's give him a hand, shall we?
"which is the hardest prelude and fuge"-The one you cannot play, Mozart.
"four voice download"-Let's all help this fella download FOUR VOICES from the net...
"bach English suit explain"-What's there to explain? Bach liked English suits and was wearing them ALL THE TIME.
"sibelius music cunt whatever"-This student is not very HAPPY with his music assignment.
"composing without instrument"-Now THERE's your average Beethoven, wannabe!.
"bach fugue generator"-This guy is looking for an automatic BACH-fugue generator. Let's all wish him GOOD LUCK in finding one.
"why did the famous Johann Sebastian Bach die?"-WHY, indeed. Perhaps because ALL HUMANS die eventually? WHY did you have to die Johann?
"Bach's insanity"-YES, Bach was completely NUTS! He managed to write 1080 incredible musical works and he had 21 kids, but his INSANITY finally got him. Fucking LUNATIC! I wish I was as INSANE as he was!
"how to write a canon Bach style"-Atta boy, Johann! you can DO it! You REALLY can!
"johann sebastian bach hot wife pics"-WHICH wife, friend? Maria Barbara or Anna Magdalena? Tell us, so we can help you locate some hot pics from 1706-1720.
"easy music may the force be with you note"-Yes, Luke. Use THE MUSIC Luke to blow up Death Star. May the note BE with you, Luke.
"bach jesus mp3 classical guitar"-Looking for mp3 classical guitar pieces by the composer 'bach-jesus'.
"smf0 to midi converters"-This
guy's looking for a converter that converts between two formats that
are the same. HELLO? smf0 IS the standard midi format.
"ludwig van beethoven- favorite fruit"-You don't know Beethoven's favorite fruit? SHAME on you! It was the kiwi, dummy. It helped with his CONSTIPATION problems.
"beethoven spacecraft"-It's
A BIRD! It's A PLANE! NO, it's...BEETHOVEN's SPACECRAFT! WATCH OUT!
"music analysis and beethoven's partita"-Beethoven didn't write any PARTITAS, Sibelius. Bach did.
"vienna fruit music midi instrument made out of fruit"-What the FUCK?!
"bach musician"-Yes, sport. When YOU can write an Oratorio which includes 20 50-voice fugues in it, as well, you'd be a 'musician', too!
"gould bach bad"-Gould's playing was 'bad', eh? Why don't YOU play some Bach for us, instead, and show us how he SHOULD be played, Beethoven?
"most complex fugues"-Why,
did you already MASTER the EASY ones, Glenn?
"glenn gould pianist third hand"-Yes. Unbeknownst to most musicologists Glenn Gould had a HIDDEN THIRD HAND which he used when he played Bach. Unfortunately nobody ever saw it.
"I have an idea for a painting"-GOOD
for YOU, but don't quit your DAY JOB, yet, DaVinci.
"lyrics to sons of god"-YEAH,
lets sing them together. I'll accompany you on the piano...
"greensleaves musical mechanism"-
Somebody is VERY impressed with their music box which plays Greensleaves
when wound up.
"painting techniqe's"-Another
illiterate bozo, wannabe painter. Learn your language FIRST, try to
paint AFTERWARDS.
"back invention 14"-This
fella likes classical music. Johann Sebastian BACK, in particular.
"music programs that has no virus"-Uh,
oh! SOMEBODY has been infected with viruses at least once. Somebody
illiterate...
"piano orgasm"-OKAY...
"piano disaster"-Another piano student who MESSED UP his exam. GOOD LUCK NEXT TIME, Mozart!
"what is a quarter piano?"-It's a piano broken in four with an ax by the student above, after he's failed his piano final.
"we shall overcome midi file"-We
MOST CERTAINLY shall. MusicXML is out, ALREADY!
"Getting away without registering Sibelius"-90% of the population is using illegal Windows programs, so this guy is right to be AFRAID!
"twelve foot steinway"-Yeah,
DREAM ON!
"prelude ii wtc not that hard"-Oh
YEAH? Let's hear YOU play it.
"music is immortal"-You
don't SAY! What other bits of wisdom do you have for us?
"note worthy composer for mac"-A
HA, HA! Keep DREAMING, dude!
"i want to listen to bach"-So
WHO's stopping you?
"I want to hear bach music"-Good
for you! Did you know there are certain circular devices called CD's,
containing his music?
"how should one interpret piano
music"-Now THERE's your average Glenn Gould wannabe.
"johann sebastian bach music you
can listen"-This guy is SMART! Did you know there's some of his
music you are not SUPPOSED to listen?
"what kind music can be played in the bars?"-Now THERE's your average budding disk jockey, contemplating his future job!
"cow sounds mid format"-Let's all give this fella a hand to build his twenty-first century symphony orchestra with cows! MOOOOOoooooo!!
Philosophy, Religion, Faith, Metaphysics, Demons, Priests, Mythology, The Meaning of Life!!
"reincarnation worksheet"-Now THERE's a studious little pupil. He/she intends to pre-arrange all his/her reincarnations using EXCEL!
"was jesus misinterpreted?"-I would think so. Look around you: Wars, famine, corrupt politicians, corrupt scientists, greedy doctors and lawyers, child abuse, psychological abuse, murder, etc. etc.
"Am I rejected by God?"-Yes. If I am rejected, so are YOU. The IMPORTANT question now, is what you can DO to make your future LESS MISERABLE.
"the bible is the tree of knowledge of good and evil"-That's RIGHT! In the garden of Eden, there was a BIBLE hanging from a tree. Adam and Eve were curious and started reading it. Well, you know the rest...
"The Most Secret of All Oranizations"-Quick. Anybody know any secret organizations?
"holy spirit manifestation dog barking in distance"-That's right. The Holy Spirit manifests directly ONLY when a dog barks in a distance.
"how do the gods of greece become immortal"-That's how. Live, Learn, Evolve, and when your stupidity decreases sufficiently one day, death may spare you.
"what the fuck is the gnostic serpents motivation for telling informing adam and eve"-This dude has a grudge against the mythical 'gnostic serpent'. Watch out.
"the knoledge of good and evil"-I think you should learn how to SPELL "knowledge" FIRST, BEFORE trying to find out about it, dude.
"luciferian witchcraft he fucked my wife"-Somebody HELP this guy. His wife got fucked by a Luciferian warlock...
"the life span of the greek monster the hydra"-It was EXACTLY 42 years. The Hydra lived for 42 years.
"things that immerse and occupied our mind"-Don't worry about that. STUPIDITY and ILLITERACY naturally protect you from such endeavors.
"how does activating god's word affect our future"-It fills our future with MORONS. THAT's how it affects it.
"if love is not immortal then how is it able to survive time?"-I think you are confusing LOVE with LUST, buddy.
"are nephilim alive today?"-I think this fella needs more BIBLE lessons to figure it out. He is STILL confused.
"what is the relationship between gabriel, michael and lucifer?"-They were BROTHERS, but one of them was NAUGHTY and decided to found his own RELIGION.
"who was born first adam and eve or australopithecus afarensis"-Another confused BIBLE student.
"australopithecus satan"-That's RIGHT. Australopithecus was SATAN INCARNATE.
"it's not the destination that counts it's the voyage"-I say, FUCK BOTH the destination AND the voyage. How about THAT?!
"kabbalah adversary"-YES! HE's the one who makes you perform stupid searches like this one. You can't fight him, so you might as well forget all about him.
"define pneuma"-Uh, don't
know. Maybe that which BLOWS?
"cannabis jehovah"-Got THAT
right. If you want good relations with JEHOVAH, stay away from it.
"was JHVH a tyrant?"-If you've read the OLD TESTAMENT and STILL cannot tell, seems to me your natural stupidity PROTECTS you WELL from this book. CONGRATULATIONS!
"real ghost images"-This
guy's looking for REAL ghost images. Not FAKE or IMAGINARY ones,
please. Only the BEST will do in his search.
"religion cures paranoia"-Sure does. Particularly in view of the fact that ANY religion is always another form of paranoia, ITSELF.
"everything is an illusion religion"-You don't need it to be a RELIGION, buddy. It's TRUE! Now blow your brains out, to end the illusion and spare us having to deal with one more IDIOT.
"scientific reason why we cannot stay alive forever"-"LIFE: Nature's way of keeping meat FRESH" -- Doctor Who
"how to apply christ's sacrifice to lives"-If you HAVE to ask, you've been REJECTED ALREADY, genius.
"reasons and effects of sacrifice"-Reasons: STUPIDITY. Effects: NONE. Next question?
"daemon university of athens greece"-That's RIGHT. That's where I graduated FROM.
"does daemon have sex?"-No, buddy. Daemons have more IMPORTANT things to do, like possess people and make them IDIOTS. Just like YOU.
"did jesus christ do a bad karma"-This guy doesn't know who jesus christ WAS and what he DID. He doesn't know grammar EITHER, so it figures.
"karma commands"-Here's ONE: 'In the name of JESUS, I command THEE, unclean spirit to exit this IDIO^C^C, ahem, man'.
"greek mythology words that is now use today"-Jesus Christ. I am gonna VOMIT.
"who was the gospel john writing for"-It was for the illiterates. Like YOURSELF.
"gospel of john pain"-That's RIGHT. Take a look for yourself.
"the name of jesus does not drive out demons"-The name of Jesus is fine. It's your FAITH that's short. Best of luck NEXT TIME, Abraham.
"you know, the ancient greeks movie"-This guy is TALKING to the search engine! Comon, let's all give him a helping hand, shall we?
"greek god morpheus hobbies"-Um, his main hobby was mountaintop climbing. His other hobby was making people dream. Which one are you interested in?
"define something undefined"-Okay.
Would you like it to be SLIGHTLY undefined, MORE undefined or
COMPLETELY undefined? If you answer this question then I'll give you
your answer.
"why dualism makes sense"-You've
got that BACKWARDS. It's BECAUSE of dualism that NOTHING makes sense.
"is our society dualist or not?"-Stare HARD at your question, dude!
"solomon's daemons"-We
CRAVE power, don't we? That AIN'T the way to do it, believe me.
"what the scriptures say about business enterprise"-This business student is VERY confused.
"priests in black gowns"-CHECK
IT OUT! Carpenter's new FILM!
"obscure priests"-Google
for DISCORDIANISM, dude.
"what would a modern priest wear?"-A negligee?.
"priests what they wear?"-Here we go again.
"what are the boots that priests
wear"-They are SPECIAL boots, to kick YOUR ASS if you don't go
to Sunday service. WATCH IT!
"why priests where black"-Because
THERE black!
"why can't people wear black and priests can?"-BE VERY CAREFUL! You can spend AT LEAST 10 days in jail if the authorities catch you wearing black and you are not a priest!
"can i wear an orthodox cassock?"-Beware that orthodox priest impersonation is PUNISHABLE BY LAW!
"picture of what do priests wear"-I think I'll open a STORE selling black clothing. You never know. All those people asking these questions may turn to be good CUSTOMERS.
"some priests don't wear pants when they wear the cassock"-How do you KNOW? Did you take a PEAK under the cassock while the priest was BLESSING you?
"whats is a priest's cloak called"-Romulan CLOAKING device. Priests wear Romulan cloaking devices, so they can appear invisible when they want.
"thing priests wear"-What's
with the fucking PRIEST obsession? Leave them alone! They have a JOB to
do!
"do our choices determine our
destiny?"-No. Our destiny is determined by LITTLE GREEN MEN with
big ears on planet Vulcan.
"control your subconscious"-Oh
YEAH? Easy for YOU to say. Have YOU tried it, sport?
"subconscious cleaner -vacuum -creditcard"-This guy wants to find out how to CLEAR his subconscious WITHOUT using a vacuum cleaner and WITHOUT paying with his credit card. Well, I've got news for you buddy: Can't be done WITHOUT using BOTH of them: A vacuum cleaner and a credit card. Bummer!
"fear frucissier"-Will do.
Any OTHER demons we should FEAR?
"daemon names"-Thinking of
SUMMONING a couple? Good luck!
"how can i get the power of clauneck"-Inquiring minds want to KNOW, how to SUMMON a specific demon. Another DARWIN AWARD candidate.
"Gender of Frucissiere"-This ingenious person want to know the 'gender' of a demon. YooHoo! Demons have no gender, you genius, you. They can fuck you in all sorts of ways, Abraham.
"how do you summon a evil and painful curse on someone that will make them feel pain until i want it to stop"-Uh oh. There's something REALLY wrong with this girl. She has ISSUES to settle.
"manifestation of the sons of god"-Here's
a clue, sport: go look in the mirror.
"how to humble oneself"-Well,
if you HAVE to ask, you probably can't do it...
"paranoia of the woods"-We
have a BLAIR WITCH fan here, folks.
"is all existence a mere illusion
of reality"-Besides the fact that the phrase doesn't parse to
begin with, even if you cut off the last two words, if YOU
can't tell, your place is in a LOONY BIN, fella.
"not being able to differentiate between dreams and reality"-Another MENTAL HOSPITAL PATIENT.
"smart mythical god"-Well,
if he was smart, he'd still have followers, wouldn't he?.
"actual blair witch"-This
fella was so impressed with the movie, he wants to SEE the witch.
"daemon consultant"-This
guy sure has found his PURPOSE in life. Good luck in your endeavors,
fella. This job pays well.
"demons attacking chicago"-YEAP.
Those pesky demons have an affinity for large cities. WATCH OUT now,
dude. They come from up high, SUDDENLY.
"where would I find a reference in
the bible to our memory being wiped out"-You won't find it in
the Bible. You'll find it in your nearest hospital records, where all
recent lobotomies are archived chronologically.
"how many biological sons did god
have"-JESUS CHRIST! What kind of question is THAT?
"is there immortality?"-Tell
you what, dude: Ride a large motorbike and accelerate to 200kms/h. Pick
a pole and crash on it head on. If you survive, tell us all about it.
"Noah's ark arafat"-YEAP,
that's where Noah's ark landed, after the Biblical flood, alright: On
Arafat's head. That's why the Jews don't like the guy.
"god mating"-YEAH, he does,
occasionally. WATCH OUT when he has an orgasm, tho. It can cause a big
bang.
"is there such a thing as the
smell of death approaching?"-YES, WATCH OUT, fella. It usually
comes from the left side.
"fake ghost manifestation"-Better
watch out for the fake ones. GOOD ghost manifestations are ALWAYS real.
"how long will it take for my cat
to reincarnate?"-Well, you've GOT to calculate WHAT it will
reincarnate INTO, then multiply THAT by ex and integrate
with respect to x, from a to b, where a is your birth date and b is
your cat's birthday, both converted to milliseconds. The answer you'll
get will be the time between now and when your cat reincarnates.
"life has no meaning"-WOW!
Took you a WHILE to FIGURE IT OUT, eh? Now GIVE IT a meaning, unless
you wanna STAY bored for the rest of your life.
"so... does life have a meaning, a purpose, a fucking something??"-See answer below.
"meaning you give it meaning of
life"-Yes, sport. That's right. Life has the meaning YOU give it.
"no significance no meaning"-You are GETTING there, sport! You REALLY are!
"messiah schizophrenia"-
Got THAT right. May I interest you in a new religion?
"latin daemons"-I don't
know about LATIN ones, but I know of some GREEK ones. Are you
interested?
"is faith a form of knowledge"-YES!
I have faith that there exists a PINK UNICORN on Alpha Centauri. What
about YOU?
"what's the fucking difference"-You've
GUESSED IT. NONE.
"the mind is a fraud"-It's
WORSE than that, sport. EVERYTHING is a fraud. BRACE yourself.
"nature is a whore"-You
DON'T SAY! Figured it out, finally, you clever thinker, you...
"non-dualism vs dualism"-That's
STILL dualism, dude!
"soul energy sources"-ENERGIZER
batteries. They keep on going and going and going....
"soul's link to the body"-You
can locate it using a GUN. Write me privately and I'll tell you what to
do.
"greek mythology Methuselah"-This poor Bible student is trying to historically locate a mythological Jewish figure in ANOTHER nation's mythology. You get an "F" in Bible studies, dude.
"what happens before you die"-NEVER MIND about that. Worry about what happens AFTER you die.
"if I die it would be as if I
never existed"-IF, and WHEN you die, you WON'T CARE about this
shit, smartypants.
"the best way to fight magus"-We
have a LORD OF THE RINGS aficionado here, folks. Let's all give him a
HELPING HAND.
"when you reincarnate when do you enter a new life"-Exactly at the point when the hairy husband starts to SNORE, after turning on the other side.
"reincarnation is fucking stupid"-We'll be hearing your opinion again, when you are going to be shitting your pants, on your deathbed.
"reincarnation is fun"-We'll be hearing your opinion again, when you are going to be shitting your pants, on your deathbed.
Matrix!
"red pill-blue pill"-This
guy STILL has problems with the original Matrix movie. HELLO!? We are
on the THIRD sequel already...
"you take the red pill, you take
the blue pill"-Doesn't matter which one you take bozo. You'd
STILL be in HELL...
"LARGE red pill"-Yes. A HUGE one. Neo swallowed a red HORSE pill. He almost choked.
"neo swallows"-Yes, we've
already ESTABLISHED that. He swallows the FUCKING RED PILL. Get over it
ALREADY.
"what happens when neo takes the
red pill"-Here we go again... YAAAAAAAAWWWWWN.
"what happens if you take the blue AND the red pill"-TOGETHER? That's easy: You go INSANE.
"how come smith died when neo died in matrix three"-It's a MOVIE, sport. ANYTHING can happen in a MOVIE.
"truman show grand architect"-Either this guy is VERY confused about who the architect was, or he's looking for Ed Harris.
"morpheus hand blue pills"-YES, Morpheus, hand the DAMN PILLS and let's have it over with, because there are TOO MANY stupid entries in this category.
"illuminati conspiracy take the red pill"-We have a SCENARIO CHANGE, fellas! Now matrix is a conspiracy by the Illuminati! Somebody WAKE this guy up, QUICK!.
"why do they want to dismantle the matrix"-Because it's ALREADY 7 years old?
"neo died in 3rd movie"-What are you gonna DO about it, sport?
Sociology, Politics, Lawyers, Human Relations, Sports, Boyfriends, Girlfriends, Advertising!!
"why are woman so vicious?"-Probably because 'woman' have SOMETHING we all want? A PUSSY for example?
"how do greeks get around their country today?"-We use CARRIAGES with HORSES and DONKEYS of course, because Greek women LOVE animals.
"how you know when you'are in a greek house"-If, when you leave your ASSHOLE is three inches WIDER, THAT's how you'll know.
"want and cannot have"-Welcome to the club of LOSERS. In case you haven't figured it out ALREADY, the answer is MONEY.
"if your mother is greek are
you greek?"-What do YOU think, genius?
"what phrases to use when somebody has a birthday"-SURPRISE them! Use CONDOLENCE phrases.
"phrases for finding a boyfriend"-With such search phrases, you are LOSING boyfriends, honey.
"phrases which will swear at an x boyfriend"-How about: 'Your brain is even smaller than your dick!'.
"intelligent words for moron idiot"-I bet this fella doesn't KNOW what a contradiction is, EITHER.
"girlfriend spends too much time with her mother"-And that BOTHERS you? It's her MOTHER sport. Mothers are the HOLIEST thing after yourself. Give her a break.
"phrases to tell your x girlfriend"-How about: 'A good masturbation session was better than the way you made sex, anyway'.
"remote control filthy phrases
swear machine"-It looks just like a REGULAR tv remote control.
You push the buttons and your 'swear machine' swears AT YOU.
"'fuck you' in ape sign language"-Apparently
some zoo APE is giving its trainer unexpected trouble.
"lawyer stupid human why i not"-Somebody
who's been HAD by LAWYERS?
"logistic logos"-I LIKE IT!
That's like saying "measurable measure".
"jealous about boyfriend
fantasizing"-Fantasizing about WHAT? It REALLY makes a
difference, you know, lady.
"should i be jealous if my boyfriend gets an erection looking at pictures of women?"-No, you shouldn't be. Because this means you are a LOUSY FUCK, yourself.
"should i care if my boyfriend bought a vagina & ass machine? we never have sex"-No, see above.
"is kissing too emotional for men if they don't want to fall in love?"-Just SCREW the guy and NEVER MIND that. He's going to deal with it later.
"yesterday I dreamt about my lover"-You
DON'T SAY! ZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz.
"dreamt of you my love"-AWWWWWWWW! Ain't that SWEET?
"how to impress my lover when she is refusing"-Just show her your 20 inch SCHLONG!
"more money"-AHA! You've
got the RIGHT IDEA, though the net won't tell you anything you don't
already KNOW.
"fuck greece / fuck greeks"- Venting some
steam via the search engine, eh? Here's a little something for you: FUCK YOU, TOO!
"greece today / what life is like in greece today"-We screw girls all day long in the beaches and on the isles. Eat your heart out.
"how do people spend a day in
greece"-Ah! We spend the whole day on the beach and the night at
the bars drinkin booze and chasing women. All year round.
"sign language-curse words"-The
correct syntax of this dictates "sign language words", but no "curse".
I think he's rather looking for curse words IN sign language, which is
even more amusing. Maybe he has a score to settle with a dumb man. You
SHOW THEM, dude! Give them the FINGER, which is universal.
"vulcan language phrase curses"-Somebody HELP this guy. He has a score to settle with SPOCK.
"malaka greek"-Somebody
told this guy what he is and he is desperately trying to find out what
it means. Here's a HINT guy: You are a MASTURBATOR.
"phrase to know before going to greece"-'MALAKA'. See above. It will be your PRIMARY NICKNAME while you are here.
"where did stupid phrises come from"-They come from stupid piple, like you.
"stupid phrases"-Your wish
is granted. Look around.
"FREE stupid phrases"-Fortunately for you, stupidity is FREE, all year round, and so are the phrases here.
"why do I google stupid phrases"-You are asking US?
"baseball bats"-WOW! What
an interesting topic. Tell us all about it, now. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....
"shoe for man"-Let's not really make fun of this guy. He is probably a one-legged cripple looking for shoes on the net.
"phrases about sons"-Here's
one: FUCK YOU, daddio.
"what is a legal system"-Now
THERE's your average wannabe lawyer genius. Let's all wish him GOOD
LUCK.
"how can fraud be detected?"-
No need to detect it. You can ASSUME for all practical purposes that EVERYONE and EVERYTHING is fraudulent in this world.
"fraud"-In GENERAL? I
assure you, you'll find out about it pretty soon, living in this world.
"what does anon mean"-It's
from "a" and the FRENCH "non" meaning "NO". "A NO".GET IT?
"who was anon"-A great philosopher of the past. Born 1684, died 1738. His motto was 'the more invisible you are, the more efficient you can be'.
"I come anon"-This guy 'comes' anon. Sexually. Watch out.
"familiarity breeds contempt"-That's
RIGHT. That's why you should make sure to change sexual partners often.
Just some friendly advice...
"stolen license plates"-Contemplating
your future career, eh?
"bush filthy piece of shit"-Someone
doesn't agree with Dubya's policies, I suppose...
"what effect have people from
greece had on the world, foodwise"-Have you heard of SOUVLAKI?
"sign language picture fuck you
curse"-EASY NOW, fella! Take a deep breath. RELAX and we can
talk about it.
"names of the smurfs"-This
fella's contemplating opening a kindergarten.
"the great deluge is at hand"-That's RIGHT! Didn't you HEAR the announcement from fucking NOAH? Build an ARK and get IN THERE QUICK.
"are you dead when you are on anesthesia?"-If you were dead genius, you wouldn't be able to WAKE UP afterwards.
"greek monster cyst pictures"-I've got a MONSTROUS cyst right on my BUTT. Email me for pictures!
"can't complete my sentances medication"-That's RIGHT. Can't SPELL, either. Better hurry with your medication.
"i get zits on random parts of my body"-So do I. It's totally DISGUSTING, so stay away from the opposite sex, cause they'll make FUN of you.
"how to survive as a fucking loser"-If you are on this page, you are doing PRETTY GOOD.
"how do you force schizophrenics to take medicine"-You beat them with a STICK.
"alien invasion parasites prison"-Got THAT right. If alien parasites invade you, you'll go to prison.
"what does it mean when dogs bark at you continuously?"-It means you are an IDIOT. Dogs can sense IDIOCY.
"dog bark meanings"-See above.
"can cats sense death approaching?"-Why don't you ASK them?.
"the devil is attacking me on my job"-Put a BIBLE next to you on your DESK!
"causes of chest vibrations"-Masturbation?
"i have cancer of the soul"-Lower you EGO, sport. That's the ONLY reliable WAY to cure that.
"what cause ass cancer and what is its symptoms?"-Causes: Lots of ass fucking. Symptoms: Illiterate SEARCHES, like YOURS.
"cannabis triggers my paranoia"-Then STAY THE FUCK AWAY from it, MORON! Geez...
"faulty premise - how is it used in mind control victim"-SOMEBODY prescribe some Zyprexa to this person, QUICK.
"the mind works on control because alien slaves are watching"-For THIS guy we need a combo of Stelazine, Zyprexa, Risperdal AND Abilify. QUICK.
"abilify illuminati"-This guy ALREADY knows what's GOOD for his mind's Illuminati conspiracies: Abilify.
"you can make me bleed internally"-WHO? ME? The search engine? ANYONE? Are you ALRIGHT? I guess not. Call 911.
"God save the queer"-YES, God fortunately is impartial with respect to sexual orientation.
"figure out if your possessed"-I think you better figure out how to SPELL first and THEN ask AGAIN.
"permanently stuffed nostril remove"-Let's all give this fella some HELP to REMOVE his permanently stuffed NOSTRIL.
"sound clicking inside nose"-We have a malfunctioning CYBORG here, folks!
"she has a snake tail"-Your girlfriend? Be VERY careful...
"is human flesh digestable"-Yes, it is. Are you related to Dr. HANNIBAL LECTER by any chance?
"how to bring back a schizophrenic patient to reality"-Show him a chick with very large BOOBS. It works, guaranteed.
"how to get rid of bad luck"-You CAN'T. You've been dealt a BAD DEAL in life. WELCOME to the club of LOSERS.
"how does science tie into demonic possession"-Don't you WORRY about that. Just keep taking your Zyprexa and leave the advanced stuff for the psychiatrists.
"nuke the fucking planet already"-Now THERE's a promising politician I would vote for!
"what actually happens when you step on a rusty nail?"-Why don't you TRY IT and find out YOURSELF?
"headaches when need to shit"-That's a very SERIOUS condition. Almost as bad as your illiteracy.
"they don't know they are being fucked"-No, "they" DON'T. But I DO. And so are YOU.
"how many advils can i take in a day"-Swallow a WHOLE BOTTLE at once. You will REALLY feel better, immediately.
"how many advils does a bottle contain?"-Do you KNOW how to COUNT, dude?
"how many advils do adults take?"-Um, as many as they need?
"cannot have love"-The very FACT that you are ALIVE, moron, is proof that someone HAS loved you.
"I lost the love of my life"-AWWWWW!!! Ain't that SAD. Stare HARD at some porno images for a WEEK, jerk-off often and try AGAIN after a while. GOOD LUCK!.
"heroin: It makes me forget everything"-If you DOUBLE the dose, you'll forget even MORE. For GOOD! GO for it, sport!
"why does demerol feel so good"-Because it's a derivative of MORPHINE? If you keep taking this stuff, you'll end up IN THE STREETS, sport.
"cystic acne is a pain in the ass"-Of COURSE it is. Cause you get cysts ON your ass, as well. Welcome to the club of losers.
"what if you have zits on your arm pits"-What about it? You will just be DISGUSTING to the opposite sex. No big deal.
"cysts under arms"-WELCOME! More members in the CLUB of LOSERS!
"what is in a cyst? puss"-This guy ANSWERS his own question to HELP the search engine. Google should send him a THANK you note.
"cyst under your arm with puss show a picture how it looks"-It looks DISGUSTING. Trust me, I KNOW.
"why cysts form on the scrotum"-Because you have hidradenitis suppurativa. Visit your dermatologist, but I'll tell you what: the prognosis DOESN'T look good, sport. It's an INCURABLE and UGLY disease.
"i am disgusting evil putrid"-Don't worry, friend. We all are. Some are HIDING it better than others.
"I want to blow my brains out"-
Do us all a FAVOR and DO IT!! Then we'll have one less IDIOT to
deal with.
"suicide situation gun on head what to do?"-See ABOVE!!.
"is suicide illegal in Crete?"-YES, it's illegal. You will be fined 10,000 dollars if you do it.
"you are fucked"-We ALL
are, friend. Haven't you heard the news? There's a SUCKER born every.
"i am a fucking idiot"-If
you SAY so, who am I to argue?
"my brother is a fucking idiot"-This family sure is a winner.
"games for people with memory
problems"-Are you gonna remember the rules?
"schizophrenia talking god"-You've
got that ALMOST right. It's THE DEVIL talking to you in schizophrenia.
"see meaning in everything schizophrenia"-That's RIGHT. If you see MEANING in EVERYTHING, you are ready for the LOONY-BIN.
"chaos schizophrenia"-Somebody's VERY VERY sick...
"funny schizophrenic phrases"-This guy thinks that schizophrenia is "funny". Let's all wish he gets the disease so he can have some "fun".
"it is something like"-YES?
Go ON. What IS it LIKE, friend?
"mercedes 600 SEC"-Somebody's
dreaming out LOUD...
"haven't slept for ages!"-Poor
guy! Try MASTURBATING and DRINKING MILK before going to bed and call me
tomorrow.
"what does it mean when you have a
bubble in your compass"-It's a CONSPIRACY by the ILLUMINATI so
that you get lost in the woods. WATCH OUT for Blair Witch.
"what's the fucking point"-There
IS none. You've guessed it. Can you bare the truth YET or do we have to
invent a NEW RELIGION for ya?
"borderline world-saving"-We
have an UNDECIDED MESSIAH here, fellas. Let's all give him a HELPING
HAND.
"tranxene is good shit"-This
one feels he needs to BROADCAST his latest buzz with the drug and
possibly CONFIRM it.
"unexplained messages"-Here's
one for you: &%@$!#*(%)DTW#$@.
"clear out black holes in face"-That's
pretty damn hard, dude: You'd have to calculate the black holes'
Schwarzschild radii, first.
"god nasal polyps"-THIS one
has me STUMPED...
"how to ease cystic acne"-
You CAN'T: You've been dealt a BAD DEAL in life: Read my lips: BAD
GENES. Don't procreate, please...
"how to approach people with
paranoia"-Um, VERY carefully?
"meaning of hallucination of
buzzing mosquito"-YEAP. Those evil pests can cause severe
hallucinations.
"chest pains while dreaming"-And
HOW exactly did you FEEL those chest pains if you were DREAMING?
"skin disease's"-Uh oh. Not
only BAD GENES, but illiteracy as well. LOSING combination.
"my skin pores are blocked with
white puss"-HEY! WELCOME to the CLUB. Now go get a gun and I
will tell you afterwards what you have to do.
"super sensitive person ugliness
stupidity"- You are UGLY, STUPID and SUPER SENSITIVE? You have
my condolences. Nature will take care of you, don't worry.
"scientific explanation for an ugly face"- This person is trying to understand why they are UGLY. As if, if an explanation existed, it would make things EASIER for them. Welcome to the club of LOSERS, friend.
"get the fuck out of my mind"-Uh
oh! Somebody has been visited by "the voices". Go have some STELAZINE,
prescribed to you QUICK, dude!
"drugs to make you sleep forever"-You'll
have PLENTY of time to do that when you DIE. Now, snap OUT of it.
"want to sleep and not wake up"-You'll
have PLENTY of time to do that when you DIE. Now, snap OUT of it.
"self-termination"-MORE
Stelazine, please!
"paranoia of the frontier"-The
Doctor said we should say "yes" to whatever you say. RELAX, now.
"malignant forces outside the house"-The
SCHIZOPHRENIC with the CHAIN-SAW, waiting outside. Better plan your
excursions CAREFULLY. People are not SUPPOSED to leave their houses.
"I have a cyst on my left butt
cheek"-Does it HURT?
"universe attacking me"-What's
with the SCHIZOS, lately?
"schizophrenia barking like a dog"-Somebody
call 911, QUICK.
"after 80 hours sleep insane"-What
EXACTLY are you trying to do, sport?
"a person awake after century"-This guy stayed asleep for a WHOLE CENTURY! GET BACK TO WORK NOW, lazy idiot!
"how to make advils"-Why? What do you have in mind? Email me. Maybe I can help.
Illucidity, Nonsense, Bullshit!
"why can't I have an organism"-This dude wants a biological organism as a pet. God knows what kind of organism...
"can anybody escape from earth without death"-Somebody just realized the deep-SHIT they are into...
"how to become motionless at work"-This dude surely has something to hide from his boss...
"lucky is the one who"-...doesn't have to read search phrases like yours?
"pdf approximate Reciprocal Links to be obtained"-Anybody knows of any 'approximate' pdf Reciprocal Links? Exact links won't do.
"greek worrier"-It's the Greek 'worriers', everyone! They WORRY a lot!
"horney dog suks from the bach by a blach eomen"-Okay! Do you have anything else to tell us? No? Back to your CAGE, now.
"in the photo we can see"-Yes, we usually can "see" in the photo. Do you have any photos we can "hear", also?
"disclaimer the author is not connected"-Sure. The author is disconnected. Hence the disclaimer.
"Playing chess to lose"-We sure have a WINNER here, folks. This guy invents a whole new strategy for chess: Playing the game with object to LOSE! WooHoo!
"can someone define the letters in the word beautiful"-HELP! Somebody DEFINE those letters, QUICK! This user needs HELP!
""unprotected" "milk" "pregnant" "cum" "my pussy" "bare""-It hurts to even try to THINK what this person is trying to search for.
"tree of knowledge back into heaven"-Let's put the Tree of Knowledge back into heaven and have it over with. It has given us too much trouble, ALREADY!
"how does one live according to john?"-Here. Find out.
"camel, symbolic symbol"-That's RIGHT. A CAMEL is a symbolic symbol for a CAMEL.
"define the letters of the word camel"-Quick! Somebody DEFINE the letters C, A, M, E, and L. Without a definition, nobody knows what they mean and we are in DANGER!
"zoo born dog fuck woman"-This guy is looking for that famous woman who was born at the zoo as the result of a dog fuck. Or something similar.
"everything has its place in life, no matter how hidden it may be under the veil of judgement"-Uh huh. The doctor said we should say 'yes' to whatever you say.
"conclusion on mosquitos"-Any word from the MIT lab for mosquitos, yet? Let's have it STRAIGHT, please.
"picture of man woman tubes connecting"-You heard RIGHT. 'Man woman tubes CONNECTING'. It's the new word for 'sex' with sci-fi writers.
"wikipedia are angels immortal"-Who? The wikipedia editors? I say the wikipedia editors are a bunch of anarchic losers.
"jesus horse cock holy spirit orgy penis"-Somebody is a little CONFUSED. That's OK, dude, keep looking!
"life as a human, the choice the creater and distroyer of all"-This dude's looking for the 'creater' and 'distroyer' of all. God help us all.
"oblivious keen attacked noble"-You were OBLIVIOUS and KEEN when you attacked that noble man, eh? Is he OK, now? Are YOU OK?
"priapistic kids"-Yeah! A bunch of kids are running around with HUGELY ERECT PENISES, looking to FUCK ALL. Somebody HELP!
"whoever follows me will never suffer missfortune, but will always have good"-Will never suffer 'miss fortune', eh? And good WHAT? Candies? Potatoes? Marshmallows? Chewing-gum? It's an "E" and more Bible lessons for this idiot.
"as if you never existed"-Why 'as if'? Do you think you are important enough to think you DO exist?
"humorous wave functions"-That's RIGHT. Let's have some new, HUMOROUS Schroendinger wave functions, for a change. The old ones are pretty boring.
"plato banned christian no see god"-Plato was a "banned" Christian, eh?. He was NOT allowed to see God. Bummer.
"how to right about you'are creative beast mind"-You start by learning how to SPELL and form syntactically CORRECT sentences. So it's back to SCHOOL for you, idiot.
"stroking my face"-Do you do that OFTEN, dude?
"what starts with a E and ends with a E and contains one letter"-The letter "E" ITSELF, idiot!
"holy flying horse fucks"-This fella either saw something REALLY interesting or is looking for pegasus porno. WooHoo!
"love can never be betrayed the same way as a tree"-Why, I didn't know that TREES could be betrayed. Thanks for telling us!
"dragon swallowed princess"-YES. The dragon swallowed the princess WHOLE. Before the knight-prince managed to get there and save her. BUMMER!
"www.fucking the puss i came from"-Searching for the website: www.fuckingthepussicamefrom.com. Wonder what are its features...
"sacrificial men are usually matrix trilogy"-Whatever you say, buddy. Don't you forget your Geodon now, you hear?
"|chicken||turkey|sin(theta)|"-That's RIGHT. The exact relationship is: |turkey*sin(theta)| = |chicken|. It's part of grandma's MATHEMATICALLY ADVANCED cooking recipes.
"man standing on the centre of 4 element and angel"-This must surely be Saint John the Evangelist contemplating writing the Revelation. Or a stoner who has taken a good dose of LSD.
"what is a shoe repair man"-It's a man who builds nuclear devices for a living.
"drilled and filled samples"-Drilled with a Black & Decker. Filled with cheese, of course...
"murphy's law, math representation"-Looking for a mathematical model for Murphy's Law, eh? Here it is: 'The moment you think it's x, it changes to not x'. When you figure out what it means, give us a ring...
"murphy's law choose the fastest supermarket line"-This guy is trying to solve the famous Murphy's Law Puzzle: 'The supermarket line you are in, is always the slowest'. YooHoo! Murphy's Law puzzles cannot be solved, genius!
"birthday curse phrases"-It's not enough that somebody has grown older by one more year, this guy wants to CURSE them.
"internal structureof fuck"-Our wannabe mad scientist got SIDETRACKED, it seems...
"are priests really relevant?"-Always. They are ALWAYS relevant, no matter what the subject. Be careful.
"cousin penis"-This feller is searching for info/photos of his/her cousin's penis ON THE NET. Let's HELP him/her a little.
"what kind of logic will the alien slaves use when human slave control ends"-Somebody call the local asylum. QUICK!.
"universe not ruled by logic"-The universe is ruled FINE. It's YOUR logic that sucks, Einstein.
"it is not provided in shareware version"-AWWWW! That SCHUCKS!
"NT society secret"-That's RIGHT. Windows NT users are a secret society. Their motto is: 'Use Windows NT!'.
"exists inside your mind"-That's RIGHT. STUPIDITY exists inside your MIND.
"schroedinger murphy drive"-That's Enterprize's new TELETRANSPORTER engine, based on Murphy's Law and the Schroedinger wave function collapsing RANDOMLY. It can transfer you to any random location in the universe. And LEAVE you there.
"it is hard to be an optimist"-Sure is. Particularly in view of this PAGE.
"optimistic visualization"-No such thing.
"married hotel in bukarest"-This guy married an entire HOTEL. What do you expect? In bukarest hotels are CHEAP and AVAILABLE.
"i fuck with your mind like an algebra equation"-A DANGEROUS TELEPATH on the loose. A dangerous PARANOID MATHEMATICIAN telepath.
"things that are real that looks like an isosceles triangle"-I think you better learn syntax FIRST, and search for such objects, LATER.
"what are the changes size of the computer for the pass 50"-The changes size of the computer for the pass 50 is 3x5+15!
"is damn a curse word punishable by law"-YES! Be VERY CAREFUL when you use this word. It carries penalties of jail sentences of over 3 years!
"bach table reach third cock fuck"-A SEVERELY disturbed computer user.
"sun wears boobs light bulbs ultraviolet"-EASY NOW, buddy! The ambulance is on its way, as we speak!
"vulcan language dumb shit"-This fella wants to say something to SPOCK. Something NASTY.
"virus looney magdalena"-Is this a NEW virus you are looking for, or are you simply RETARDED?
"greek suitcase"-Don't worry friend. We'll carry all your personal belongings for you. Now OFF YOU GO to the HOSPITAL.
"hitler born to be alive read my lips download"-Another idiot playing with the Search Engine.
"souvlaki pussy for sex fuck"-This guy is contemplating vacations in GREECE. Or putting a whole souvlaki inside somebody's pussy. Yeah, we get the CREATIVE types here, as well...
"know what i look like naked"-This guy simply wants to know what he looks like naked. That's not much to ask. And he is looking for it ON THE NET!
"addictive personality proliferate survival throughout history"-You never know WHO you are going to meet on the internet. This one sounds like an interesting one.
"hold me now polyp"-Hold on TIGHT! We've already called 911. Don't you WORRY!
"dream yelled at"-Were you REALLY yelled at in your dream? Awww! Schucks!
"pink colored kitchen utensils"-We have Bozo-the-Clown here, folks, having an insatiable DESIRE to start cooking! Let's all give him a HELPING HAND!
"a paragraph on a kind and compassionate act is often its own reward"-If YOU say so...
"cunt tracker"-I've heard of virus trackers, html page trackers, but what the heck is a 'cunt tracker'. Does it need to be 'installed' somewhere?
"diverging soul"-I think this guy is a little confused with mathematics and psychology.
"why women fall in love with assholes"-They tend to do that, yeah. Perhaps you should direct a study and provide for some serious correlations.
"do women crave big penis?"-No. They crave ASSHOLES. See above.
"why women are stupid"-I have no idea. Try interacting with some and you'll soon find out.
"in your rest, Lord"-Yes, Lord. Bless us WHILE YOUR ARE RESTING, so WE CAN REST, TOO!
"if the lord don't put a good dream in your mind"-If The Lord don't put a good dream in our minds, it's a BUMMER.
"kindergarten on the sky"-Yeap. It's a SPECIAL kindergarten for gifted kids which was built to SAVE them from all the IDIOTS who perform STUPID SEARCHES.
"how stupid gene activation takes place"-It all starts when you search for phrases like this one!
"bull cunt"-What do you have in mind, genius?
"dragon swallowed stomach -sun -moon -bible -saint -margaret"-Check the JUDICIOUS use of the EXCLUDED references!
"function of a veil"-Yeap. It's the function F(veil). Pretty useful function in MATH.
"greek mythology references american express card"-You won't find references of the American Express cards in Greek mythology. Don't you KNOW the Ancient Greeks were using MasterCard?
"knowitall manual"-A manual that describes ALL of it, eh? Try having kids and you will be able to write your VERY OWN very soon!
"if a guy has big feet... phrase"-How about: "If a guy has big feet, he's a fucking HOBBIT"? Is your name FRODO, by any chance?.
"pleasure eases pain"-Depends on whether you are a masochist or not, dude.
"engraving disadvantages"-Whatever
you say.
"meaning of you are getting there!"-This fella doesn't know what 'getting there' means. Try more searches like this and you'll be 'getting there' very soon!
"fuck origin"-Is that as
'fuck our origins' or as 'origins of fucking'?
"you know you are a * if"-What's
with the wildcard character? DORK? Fuckhead, moron, idiot? What are you
looking for, friend?
"transformation pig or cow"-Sounds
like a GOOD CHOICE to me. How are you gonna go about it?
"pain whore"-Is she giving
BIRTH?
"whore of heaven"-Hmmmmmm...
"how people became so numb"-I'd
rather want to know how people became so DUMB.
"pregnant cow transform computer boyfriend"-What in God's name is this person looking for?
"fuck"-What EXACTLY are you
looking for? Hoping to get laid via
the net?
"shit baths"-Beats me. I
have no idea what this guy's looking for, although one could easily
arrange for such a thing. No need to search the net, dude...
"girl hypnosis transformation cow"-This
guy wants to hypnotize a girl so he can...transform her into a cow. Way
to go, dude!
"Pneuma lyrics"-Beats me.
Maybe SPIRITUALS? Who knows.
"Something resembles a certain card"-A
visually impaired man looking at his American Express card? Do you KNOW
me? That's why I always carry one of THESE...
"doctor's resume"-There's
only ONE doctor WITHOUT a name: Doctor WHO. And he doesn't HAVE a
resume. He is a FICTIONAL TIMELORD for crying out loud....
"bursting cyst on brain"-Is
that what's causing you to perform searches like this?
"exactly the other side of the
globe"-Yeap, that's where I am, alright. Why do you ask?
"'go through procedure'"-Yeap,
better hurry with that lobotomy, cause your searches are stupid.
"inside nostril is different"-Different from WHAT, exactly?
"pretend to be a gypsy"-You
DO that, fella, and come back after a year of nomadic and filthy life
and tell us what it's like.
"composer global constraint local
search"-OKAY...
"machines that man makes, make man
a machine"-YEAH! GO for it BABY...
"clarification in silver"-YEAP.
One NEEDS some clarification in silver. Otherwise,..., I don't know.
"man's brain exposed"-Don't
go NEAR this guy. I am not sure his intentions are all that pure.
"fuck you, stupid search program!"-Easy
now, fella. Remember that whatever search program you use, pretty much
reflects YOUR stupidity.
"tutorial"-Hey, you've
found one, here. Use it well.
"i liked to say i could trust you"-And
now you don't LIKE it anymore? What a shame! TRUST me WITHOUT saying
it, then.
"women are not men machines"-Course
they aren't. They are WOMEN machines.
"baseball dog logos"-A dog
which plays baseball and talks at the same time? Who knows what this
guy's looking for...
"faith and the electric dog"-WHAT
THE HECK is an 'electric dog'? Does it bite?
"fuck you"-WHO's 'you',
perfesser?
"why will a dog starve around food?"-Um,
because you forgot to unleash him?
"woman finds shit in car radio"-NO
SHIT! What did she do about it?
"the most horrible paradigms"-ON
WHAT, sport? On Philosophy? Painting? Engineering? Writing? When you
decide, let us know and we'll find something for ya.
"uh, I don't know. Why am I doing
at this stupid search engine"-I DO! You are a bored college
student, trying to do HOMEWORK?
"you got to be fucking stupid search engine"-No: The search engine is FINE. YOU are the one who's STUPID.
"fuck off and die you stupid fucking search engine"-EASY now!
"what the fuck kinda search phrase is this?"-THAT's what I am wondering, TOO!
"phrases with shit"-Do you
want MAYO on those, too?
"what should cleaning lady do"-Um,
clean the house and then, MAYBE, give the owner a blowjob? What is it
with these questions with obvious answers?
"cleaning lady gives him a blowjob"-SEE? This guy ALREADY knows the answer.
"faith the human dog"-Yes,
have FAITH in the human dog. The HUMAN DOG is our SAVIOR.
"what do logos convey?"-It's
the NEW OS for Macs, operating using the Mathematical function LOG(z).
"samples"-Of WHAT kind,
genius? Porno? Music? Programming?
"infinite subs"-CHECK IT
OUT! The new Russian well kept secret. Better notify the PENTAGON,
quick.
"maria's turtles"-You
LIKE'em, eh? Do you like Maria as well?
"summary of faith and the electric
dogs"-WTF?
"the boss's desk"-Pretty
impressive, huh? When you get a promotion, you'll get a desk just like
this one. Meanwhile, BACK TO WORK!!
"prettiest woman's body"-Uh,
huh. Is THIS what you are thinking while on the job?
"I recollect a wondrous moment"-I
DO TOO: When you were smarter. As it is, you REMAIN an idiot.
"gradient of desire"-Yeap.
It often points UPWARDS, too!
"the significance of motionless"-Yeap,
there's lots of significance in motionless. Cause that's DEATH, genius.
"brain airbrush"-YEAP!
Sprays mushed grey matter!
"contradictory behavior"-Haven't
you HEARD the latest NEWS? Contradiction
is GOD.
"hairy chest superstition"-I
guess most males have this PROBLEM!
"cage probably causes paranoia"-Um,
I think you are RIGHT about THAT: If you put one in a CAGE, chances are
one will go insane. Did your parents put you in one when you were an
adolescent?
Countries by Stupidity:
(You can safely exclude . That's the author checking the page)
. That's the author checking the page)